Week 38: Deadwood Season 2, Disc 1

Oh, it feels good to be back in Deadwood. I missed you cocksuckers. Am I crazy or are the writers actually toning back all the cursing this season? I did not feel overwhelmed by references to c*cks and c*nts this disc. But then again, maybe they’re just building up to it.

I still think this is a great show though the convoluted plot line that involves Deadwood needing to have a mayor, sheriff, etc. in order to remain independent from the United States is so confusing that I’m completely lost. All I know is that Al Swearengen is still bad and Seth Bullock is still hot, er, good.

I must say that if I have to watch Ian McShane (as Al Swearengen) deliver one more lengthy soliloquy in his grimy union suit while he gets a bj from a prostitute, I may give up. I have seen more of that man’s saggy bags than any person should. How would you like to be the costumer on the show who gets to handle his ass-panel? You know, the person who has to make sure it looks appropriately poop-stained?

Honey, how was work today?
Oh, you know. The usual. I had to wash McShane’s filthy ass-panel by hand again.
That hand that you’re using to mix that salad right now?
Uh, yeah, I guess it is.
You’ve got, you know, something crusty on your finger there. Is that a … hair?
It’s probably best if I don’t answer.

Week 13: Deadwood, Season 1, Disc 1

Damn, this is a good show. Shit yeah! Cocksucker!

Sorry, I got a little carried away with Deadwood-speak. I remember when this show came out a few years ago, all anyone could talk about was how much the characters swore. We, being HBO-free, never understood what the fuss was all about.

Now I fucking get it.

They swear a lot. A ridiculous amount. So much that it is totally distracting. And it almost ruins the show a bit. Which is a shame because Deadwood is so good, it doesn’t really need the shock-value of an ill-advised “cocksucker” every two minutes.

That being said, I’m in love with Deadwood. I can’t believe we waited this long to watch it. I’ve always had a thing for westerns, but what’s great about Deadwood is that it’s so dirty and gritty and wild. It makes you a little grateful to have concrete sidewalks and sanitation systems.

Deadwood is a wild west prospecting camp where outlaws come to strike it rich. Seth Bullock (played by Timothy Olyphant, whose voice is weirdly identical to Bill Paxton’s) arrives in Deadwood and immediately strikes up a rivalry with the corrupt owner of the local brothel/saloon, Al Swearengen (Ian McShane). The cast is colorful, corrupt and dirty. Seth’s partner is Sol “the Jew”. Well, I’m sure all the outlaws in town will just open their arms to welcome a Jew. I can’t imagine there will be any trouble for him at all. Nope. I’m sure he'll just slip under the radar.

The first disc contained just two episodes and already there have been a half-dozen murders, beatings and even a few gunfights. It’s a pure, guilty pleasure. Oh, and Wild Bill Hickok is also in town and is so cool and smooth he could best any modern-day superhero.

I can’t wait for the next disc. Oh, sorry. I meant to say: I can’t fucking wait for the next cocksucking disc. Cocksucker.