Week 24: Batman Begins

First, I must admit a hard truth here. Somewhere in my awkward early teen years, I developed a deep and unwavering love of the 1989 version of Batman starring Michael Keaton and Jack Nicholson. So much so that to this day I can still quote the movie line-for-line. It is sad, but true. Give me enough to drink at a party (mama likey de vodka) and I'll perform it for you. I even know all the lyrics to that crappy Prince soundtrack for the movie. I like bats...Vicky Vale, Vicky Vale...

And as much as that tells you about my social life and cool-factor in high school, it should also tell you that I practically beat down the doors of the theater to watch Batman Begins. Or as it shall forever be known as henceforth: THE MOST PERFECT SUPERHERO MOVIE EVER.
The reasons why I love this movie are many. Let us count the ways.

• It's not campy. It's not funny. It's just dark and moody. And it's perfect. Simply the best re-telling of a story we all know in a way that made it completely fresh and exciting.
• It officially moves Christian Bale off my "creepy" list, in spite of the fact that he still has little muskrat teeth. See my review of The Prestige for confirmation. I have never been a Bale fan. He gives me the willies. I'm sorry....GAVE me the willies. Now that I see he is the perfect Batman, I have flip-flopped my stance on Bale faster than a republican candidate looking for a nomination.
• Katie Holmes. You get to spend a lot of time considering her as unspoiled in this movie (that is: not scientologized yet).
• Cool toys: this movie has by far the best bat toys of any movie. You only have to watch one scene with the Batmobile to get my meaning.
• Christopher Nolan directed it. If he directed me out of my driveway each morning, it would probably win an Oscar. Everything this man touches turns to cool. I bet he is a real bummer to hang out with, but man, this guy can make a movie.

In short, although I know it makes me a total geek and possibly a teenaged boy, I LOVE BATMAN BEGINS. And I am eagerly awaiting the sequel. Mr. Nolan, get on that, would ya? Don't worry if Tom Cruise won't let Katie --er-- Kate, play. We won't miss her.